Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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