It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
then he tried to convert me to islam
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
