it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
