Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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