Well douche your snatch and let's go!
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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