just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
