Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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