so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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