My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
where am i from again
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
