Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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