Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
