I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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