And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
