So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
