Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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