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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize