it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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