Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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