I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
