i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
