some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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