Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
