You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
