: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
