I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
That was before I lit my hair on fire
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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