New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize