so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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