Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Shitshow foam night was such a success
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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