no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize