At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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