a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
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