just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
