I just made out with a guy for $7.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
