we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
