You smell like stripper and shame
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
