so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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