One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
