I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
