oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
