i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
