are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
