I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
