idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
