Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
