I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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