dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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