Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
