so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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