How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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