I'm pants shitting drunk right now
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
